Results You Desire

You're probably someone who works very hard and constantly strives to do better and grow all while taking care of your team and your family. You are in constant pursuit of some goal or some result that you want to achieve. So at times it can be really frustrating and discouraging when it seems that the thing you've been striving toward remains out of reach the type of relationship that you desire with your partner, good friends, the promotion, or the title you'd like, or the physical health you'd like to improve. The one question I used to ask team members when they were in this situation was what will you have then when you get that result that you don't have. Now, the reason I ask this question is because quite often, it's not the headliner that someone wants the title or the money. It's the perception of what they will have when they get it.

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What we actually want is typically much simpler and much more attainable than the result we've been striving for. It's not about the promotion. It's about being able to have more autonomy over your schedule so you can create better boundaries to protect your family time. It's not about being, you know, physically fit. It's about being able to have those special moments with your kids and be present for them because that's what they will remember. It's not about making more money. It's about creating financial stability for your family. So you can help them feel safe. If this is the case, how do you work on giving yourself what you desire? This is actually what you want, not the result, but we go at it the other way around. We strive for that result. But when we step back and observe ourselves often the result, if we're really, really honest is some form of wanting validation, worthiness, or acceptance from others.

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Some proof that we are okay, the irony is that sometimes when we get that result, it doesn't make us feel any of that. It doesn't make us feel okay, long term. It might for a bit, but it doesn't typically last. And so what do we do? We go find a different goal and result that we want thinking that this will be the thing that will help us feel fulfilled. What we need to do is focus on what actually matters, and that is identifying what is missing. What do I actually desire that I'm trying to use this goal or result fulfill? We need to pay attention to this internal world, the invisible stuff that we don't really like to talk about, but which really drives our level of happiness and fulfillment. It's challenging, to admit what we truly desire. It makes us feel really squishy and weak and uncomfortable, and probably a little tender at times when we start to name and identify and give ourselves what we desire, the results follow naturally, and more effortlessly over time.

When I started my own business, I did it with the understanding of what it was for. Outside of supporting loyal leaders like you and aligning my work with my highest and best contribution. My business is structured around, creating more quality time with my family and friends. I wanna have deep, close, fulfilling relationships. So even though at times I get off track, I know what I actually desire. And that is what my goal and my result is in that desire, it takes a series of tiny actions and awareness to keep building on what your desire and to begin looking past the results initially feels counterintuitive, but it works every time. So think about the current goal that you have and the result you are hoping to achieve and ask yourself, what will you have been that you are missing now? That's what you actually want. Shift your focus to what you desire, not the result because denying your feelings, delays your fulfillment.

So let us know what you actually desire. And one little tiny action that you can take that will create more of it right now. If it's the ability to be present with your kids or your team, start practicing, putting your phone away for meetings or paying attention to the chatter in your head. Not because you can control it because if you notice it, it doesn't take as much space. This lets you be more present right now. And it's one tiny action and it takes practice. There's no need to achieve a certain result. First shift your focus to your desires, not to result and take one tiny action that aligns to your desire. We hope to hear from you.

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